Everyone has their own set of rules that they set for themselves, like "I will never (insert action here)". I have my own set and today, I just broke one of them. The very one that I've had for as long as I can remember. It was "I'll never cry over some stupid boy" and I just did. I cried for the lost opportunity to love the person ever, for doing the right thing, for struggling with myself to let go. I realized that it takes so much strength and courage to let go of something you want so bad. By letting things go, you don't know what you're holding on to anymore. There's nothing left.
I wanted so much for him to screw up, to mess up, for his ugly side to show but all I see and all I hear are the good things. He won an iPod shuffle the other day and I went to get my air tickets confirmed with one of the staff workers and she told me that he gave the shuffle to her. No strings attached because he knew that she needed an mp3 player. How can one hate a person like that? Teach me! I wanted him to make me hate him, to despise his guts so that letting go would be easy. But it isn't at all. It isn't.
4 comments:
*HUGS*
It sounds so hard, dearie and it is. It helps to know less about that person 'cos all the good things you hear about them just makes it harder to let go. I pray that God will give you telinga kuali so that what you hear will not shake your heart. But that you'll smile and say, "Hey, I've got good taste in men! Yaay me :)"
*HUGGGGGGGG*
Thank you for your concern and for your prayer. I think I'm going to need it very much. I think taking an exam is easier than dealing with this. >_< And yes, so far...I think I have good taste in men! XD
-.-" its been a while since i drop by your blog.. hmmmmm... Hang in there my lovely cousin.. when ur back here u know i will hunt u.. hehehe...
Are you sure you're going to come and look for me? Or will I have to go and drag you out?
Post a Comment