This Is The Answer!

John Mayer - Split Screen Sadness

And I don’t know where you went when you left me but
Says here in the water you must be gone by now
I can tell somehow
One hand on the trigger of a telephone
Wonderin' when the call comes
Where you say it’s alright
You got your heart right

Maybe I’ll sleep inside my coat and
Wait on your porch ‘till you come back home
Oh, right
I can’t find a flight

We share the sadness
Split screen sadness

Two wrongs make it all alright tonight
Two wrongs make it all alright tonight
Two wrongs make it all alright tonight
Two wrongs make it all alright tonight

"All you need is love" is a lie 'cause
We had a love but we still said goodbye
Now we’re tired, battered fighters

And it stings when it nobody’s fault cause there's
Nothing to blame At the drop of your name
It’s only the air you took and the breath you left

So maybe I’ll sleep inside my coat and
Wait on your porch 'til you come back home
Oh, right
I can’t find a flight
So I’ll check the weather wherever you are
Cause I wanna know if you can see the stars tonight
It might be my only right

We share the sadness
(two wrongs make it all alright tonight)
Split screen sadness
(two wrongs make it all alright tonight)
We share the sadness
(two wrongs make it all alright tonight)
Split screen sadness
(two wrongs make it all alright tonight)

I called
because
I just
Need to feel you on the line
Don’t hang up this time
And I know it was me who called it over but
I still wish you'd fought me ‘til Your dying day
Don’t let me get away

Cause I can’t wait to figure out what’s wrong with me
So I can say 'this is the way that I used to be
There’s no substitute for time
Or for the sadness
(two wrongs make it all alright tonight)
Split screen sadness
(two wrongs make it all alright tonight)
We share the sadness
(two wrongs make it all alright tonight)
Split screen sadness
(two wrongs make it all alright tonight)
Oh and the sadness
It's alright, it's alright
Oh and the sadness
It's alright, it's alright
Oh and the sadness
It's alright, it's alright

Going Home!

I just booked my flight to go back home to Malaysia at the end of the year! I am really really excited! XD I am looking forward to seeing my family, friends and eating all the delicious food that I've been deprived of. It'll be a somewhat short trip...4 weeks or 27 days to be exact. I'm not complaining but on the way back, I might have to bum in Singapore for a day which is nice. A mini personal vacation just before school starts. :)

My friend Jon is heading back today for the rest of the summer before school starts. I was tempted to ask him to smuggle me back in his suitcase but figured it would be an uncomfortable journey and I would have to do a lot of explaining to my bosses. And besides, I need the money for school. Bleh!

At least now, I have something to look forward to during the dreary months of November and December.

All Will Be Well - The Gabe Dixon Band

The new day dawns,
And I am practicing my purpose once again.
It is fresh and it is fruitful if I win but if I lose,
Oooooo  I don’t know.
I will be tired but I will turn and I will go,
Only guessing til I get there then I’ll know,
Oh oh oh I will know.

All the children walking home past the factories
Could see the light that’s shining in my window 
As I write this song to you.
All the cars running fast along the interstate
Can feel the love that radiates
Illuminating what I know is true,
All will be well.
Even after all the promises you’ve broken to yourself,
All will be well.
You can ask me how but only time will tell.

The winter’s cold,
But the snow still lightly settles on the trees.
And a mess is still a moment I can seize until I know,
That all will be well.
Even though sometimes this is hard to tell,
And the fight is just as frustrating as hell
All will be well.

All the children walking home past the factories,
Could see the light that’s shining in my window 
As I write this song to you.
All the cars running fast along the interstate
Can feel the love that radiates
Illuminating what I know is true
All will be well.
Even after all the promises you’ve broken to yourself
All will be well.
You can ask me how but only time will tell.

Keep it up and don’t give up
And chase your dreams and you will find
All in time.

All the children walking home past the factories
Could see the light that’s shining in my window 
As I write this song to you.
All the cars running fast along the interstate
Can feel the love that radiates
Illuminating what I know is true,
All will be well.
Even after all the promises you’ve broken to yourself,
All will be well.
You can ask me how but only time will tell.

All will be well.
Even after all the promises you’ve broken to yourself,
All will be well.
You can ask me how but only time will tell.

You can ask me how but only time will tell.

The First Day of Spring

What's love got to do with it?

A lot apparently.

A Dose of Yew

People are like plants. When you nurture and take care of it, it grows into a beautiful and healthy thing. However if you leave the plant in the care of a misguided gardener, your plant might end up injured, scarred or worse...dead.

Rehabilitating a plant that you rescued from neglect isn't easy as well. Gardeners would know this. Depending on how badly mistreated the plant is, it might not even immediately respond to watering, sunlight or fertilizer...it might even lose all its leaves and turn yellow. But it is not neccessarily dead.

With a lot of patience and care, change will happen eventually in spite of all the scars left behind. Roots regrow, stems turn green again and leaves sprout. However, this doesn't mean that the plant is alright just yet.

Wait for flowers...

Flyleaf - So I Thought

All your twisted thoughts free flow
To everlasting memories
Show soul
Kiss the stars with me
And dread the wait for
Stupid calls returning us to life
We say to those who are in love
It can't be true 'cause we're too young
I know that's true because
So long I was
So in love with you
So I thought

A year goes by
And I can't talk about it
The times weren't right
And I couldn't talk about it

On my knees
Dim lighted room
Thoughts free flow try to consume
Myself in this
I'm not faithless
Just paranoid of getting lost or that I might lose
Ignorance is bliss cherish it
Pretty neighborhoods
You learn too much to hold
Believe it not
And fight the tears
With pretty smiles and lies
About the times

Choris Romance says goodnight
Close your eyes and I'll close mine
Remember you, remember me
Hurt the first, the last, between
Choris Romance says goodnight
Close your eyes and I'll close mine
Remember you, remember me
Hurt the first, the last, between

And I'm praying that we will see
Something there in between
Then and there that exceeds all we can dream
So we can talk about it

And I'm praying that we will see
Something there in between
Then and there that exceeds all we can dream

And all these twisted thoughts I see
Jesus there in between
And all these twisted thoughts I see
Jesus there in between

Mat Kearney - Nothing Left To Lose

Maybe Tomorrow

by Stereophonics

I've been down and
I'm wondering why
These little black clouds
Keep walking around
With me
With me

It wastes time
And I'd rather be high
Think I'll walk me outside
And buy a rainbow smile
But be free
They're all free

So maybe tomorrow
I'll find my way home
So maybe tomorrow
I'll find my way home

I look around at a beautiful life
Been the upperside of down
Been the inside of out
But we breathe
We breathe

I wanna breeze and an open mind
I wanna swim in the ocean
Wanna take my time for me
All me

So maybe tomorrow
I'll find my way home
So maybe tomorrow
I'll find my way home

In Heels

I forsee the week ahead to be a rather lazy one. One of my classes is totally canceled for the entire week which is awesome! And so is one of my labs because its taught by the same professor and he's going away for a conference for most of the week. Yay me! So I only have class on a total of 3 days out of the week. Woot!

Been thinking lately. I've been feeling mostly down in the dumps or emo for more than a month already and I'm so sick of it. What is the point of feeling like crap when you cannot fix the problem and worrying about it does not help the situation one bit, right? I mean, there is only so much I can do so I've finally decided to let it go and go with the flow. If things are meant to change, it will happen eventually.

So right now, I'm just trying to be my usual self. I sacrificed my heels for several months and that didn't do me any good. I bet he didn't realize it either. Finally took those shoes out of the closet tonight and strutted around in them. It felt good to be wearing my shoes again. They never fail to make me feel better. :)

The Little Girl

There once was this little girl,
who grew up in the world,
on which fairytales and romance unfurled;

She knew love no other way,
and grew up trying to give her heart away,
but only to find such dismay.


She got it back broken,
shattered, splintered and trodden,
instead of being lovingly taken;

Alas she said,
will I end up being unwed?
as she looked to the future with dread.


She made a decision,
to hide and strengthen,
her heart instead of letting it get stolen;

She prayed to God, put her heart in a box,
and chained it up with locks,
to ensure she will not fall for any boy with a mohawk.


She gave God the key,
knowing that He will keep this thing of beauty,
forever in His safety;

He kept her heart under lock and key,
lovingly for temporary safety,
from any Tom, Dick or Harry.


But in secret, He set apart,
a man after His own heart,
who will in the end be her sweetheart;

Time will only tell,
if this bonny Belle's,
story will end well.

*Copyright belongs to Amanda L.

Vienna

Slow down you crazy child
You're so ambitious for a juvenile
But then if you're so smart tell me why
Are you still so afraid?
Where's the fire, what's the hurry about?
You better cool it off before you burn it out
You got so much to do and only
So many hours in a day

But you know that when the truth is told
That you can get what you want
Or you can just get old
You're gonna kick off before you even get halfway through
When will you realize...Vienna waits for you

Slow down you're doing fine
You can't be everything you want to be
Before your time
Although it's so romantic on the borderline tonight (tonight)
Too bad but it's the life you lead
You're so ahead of yourself
That you forgot what you need
Though you can see when you're wrong
You know you can't always see when you're right(you're right)

You got your passion you got your pride
But don't you know that only fools are satisfied?
Dream on but don't imagine they'll all come true
When will you realize
Vienna waits for you

Slow down you crazy child
Take the phone off the hook and disappear for a while
It's alright you can afford to lose a day or two
When will you realize...
Vienna waits for you.

And you know that when the truth is told
That you can get what you want
Or you can just get old
You're gonna kick off before you even get halfway through

Why don't you realize...Vienna waits for you
When will you realize...Vienna waits for you



I remember listening to this song at the movies, but not to the words, hence, I forgot about it eventually. YT sent it to me the other day and it triggered something in me. I've been so busy working lately and studying that I forgot the little things in life. I've been putting work, studies and myself on a pedestal. Nothing is good enough...no one is good enough. I miss watching TV and movies shoulder to shoulder, thinking of what to cook for dinner...laughing together.

Sweet Madness

This week was a mad rush to tie up loose ends and to squeeze as many mamak/shopping outings with my available friends. Today, I went to the dentist and to the NIRC department to collect my IC. My mum decided that she needed to get me some Traveller’s Checks at the last minute so we went to the bank, twice because my mum couldn’t make up her mind.

The past few days, I had trouble packing because the amount of things I had to squeeze into my luggage was so overwhelming that I decided to give up for the moment. However, Delle came over today and helped me squeeze all my clothes and things into the 2 bags. I wouldn’t be able to fit everything into my bag without her help. She a gem! Love you lots Delly, thanks for helping me pack! Will miss you when I leave. Looking forward to seeing you in about 11 months time. Hee!! Now my bags are packed but I’m not ready to go…just yet. Surprisingly, I still have a little bit of space left in my carry on luggage in which I will stow treats such as asam, herbal tea mix, tom yum paste and bak kut teh ingredients for me to savor when I feel cravings for Malaysian food.

To YT, thank you for the collage cum card. I will bring it with me by hook or by crook! I couldn’t think of a better farewell present. I will miss every single one of you when I’m over there, especially on Friday nights.


To Hannah, thank you for the lovely card and the sweet reminder of friendship. When I miss your laughter and am feeling down, I will take it out and know that it would cheer me up. I’d hate to not be able to see you again before I leave, so do try and make it on Monday. It was already sad enough to hug you goodbye just now at the car park.


I’m sad that it will be 11 months or so before I’m able to come back and see my friends, family and CG members. But on the other hand, there is so much to expect and experience over in the States. Living on my own without parental supervision *cheeky grin*, finally pursuing my major and adapting to the lifestyle and culture of America. Last year flew by so quickly and I hope that this one will too…

Shopping and More Shopping

Hmm...Grace is leaving tomorrow morning. So fast already. Hate the fact that I'm going to leave soon as well. I've been going on shopping sprees recently and I've bought 4 pairs of pants, a jacket, a scarf, a beret and other items in just the span of 1 week. That set me back quite a bit but then again, they were all on sale and neccessary. Been talking to Grace about TSA locks and from what I read online...things don't sound too promising. I invested in 3 TSA approved locks just yesterday at RM29 each but now, after reading what people had to say online, I have very little faith in US Customs. From today onwards, I will be praying that nothing bad will happen to my luggage when I head to the States. Nothing will be stolen or put into my bag nor will they break the locks on my bag.

Anyways, been feeling a little under the weather today but I hope that I'll be back to my normal self soon. In time for Nianci's and Eugene's wedding.

Christmas Time Is Near

It’s that time of year again. Time to raid the storeroom and hunt down all relevant paraphernalia related to ‘the most wonderful time of year’. I don’t know about you but I love Christmas. It is one of the rare times that I actually feel like a kid again. I’ve already took out the quintessential artificial tree (applicable to those living in the tropics) and all necessary decorations and tinsel to decorate the tree with. My mum is coming back today from Cambodia so, what better time to put up the tree than today and give her a pleasant surprise.

Putting up the tree is not as easy as it seems. In my house, it requires a little planning and the moving of furniture around to accommodate the tree in the living room. Every year, there is a color theme for the tree and it usually alternates every year. I gave up on decorating the tree with (breakable!) glass ornaments ever since someone in the family broke more than half of them at one go by just being awfully impatient. To be honest, I was horrified and believe it or not…traumatized by the whole event. I even stopped taking part in putting up the tree for a year or two. Okay, I admit that I’m a sentimental person and when incidents like that happen, it’s not something I get over easily. So now, every time I see some really nice delicate and fragile ornament and for a moment, consider how it might look on the tree, I’d tell myself to forget about it.

Anyways, I’ve already started shopping for presents. I’m glad that this year, the list is rather short in comparison to past years. It means that I’ll have less to think about and yes, also less to spend on. But, I’ve decided that since there are fewer people on my list, I’ll get the ones on my list better presents. I’ll see if you’re naughty or nice to me. By the way, I’m compensating this Christmas for the fact that I’ll be away for the most part of next year. I’ll only be home for Christmas…

After putting up my birthday wishlist, I realized that having one really works! You don’t end up getting something that you don’t want or need. :P So, this Christmas, here is mine:

1. A salon quality hairdryer (my old hand me down one has given me electric
shocks on more than one occasion)
2. Stella McCartney’s ‘Still” EDP
3. Several excellent CDs (to take with me to the States)
4. Bobbi Brown’s Limited Edition Lip Gloss Trio
5. Great Christmas and New Year celebrations to usher in 2007!

Farewell Rina

Yes, it’s true. Rina is leaving for Australia to be with her future husband Wu. We will miss her horribly and therefore, we decided that it would be fitting to throw her a farewell party, BBQ style at Eugene’s place. The food was fab and the pranks even better! Once a member of Klang Youth, always will be. We will miss you loads Rina! Thanks for being such a great sport and enduring such horrible pranks from us. We owe you for training us to only be the best pranksters in town and we will definitely carry on your legacy in our CG. Wishing you all the best and may your decision to move to Australia and marry Wu be the best one you’ve made in your life!

An Apple A Day Keeps The Doctor Away

After the PC Fair, I was suffering from a horrible neckache due to the long hours of sitting down on bar stools without back support. To make matters worse...I felt a little ill starting the Tuesday after...I had a slight sore throat. Little did I know that the sore throat would escalate into a bad sore throat and flu. After being and feeling sick for close to one week, I could take it and went to the doctor today.
As I stepped into the clinic, apparently, I wasn't the only one feeling under the weather. There were approximately 15 other people waiting at the clinic. I had to wait for 45 minutes before I could see the doctor! I was then duly diagnosed and given my medication which included antibiotics. I will take them religiously until I feel better. Actually, I feel better already! It's amazing what a visit to the doctor's office can do for one.

$ $ $

For the most part of my long holiday, I’ve been lazing on my arse, watching TV and sleeping. Two weeks ago, I received a job offer from Yvonne to work for PenDrive. The pay was too good to say no. RM 150 a day for 3 days and that did not include commission. In the end, I got hired to promote and explain new software for that company at the Pikom software exhibition. In the whole process, I managed to overcome my fear of approaching and talking to complete strangers (cute guys included) and made several friends in the process.

I managed to get to know 2 other girls who was working with us and Niumal and Jason. The funny thing was that Niumal seemed like an older version of someone I knew but couldn’t tolerate. Another thing, I managed to meet a rather dashing fellow from Macedonia. Let’s just say that his compliments made my day the whole time I was there! Hopefully I will be able to work again with these awesome people at the upcoming PC Fair next month. I’ll keep you posted.

TOEFL

No matter if your first language is English, foreign Universities somehow need to confirm your level of English; to see if it's up to par. Therefore, I'll be going to take my TOEFLS tomorrow at some obscure location in KL.So far, I've done one practice exercise for it on the Internet, I hope it somehow helped me get the idea of what will happen tomorrow.

The test does not come cheap, it's USD140 for starters. In addition to that, I was reading the registration website the other day and it stated that you could only take the test once a month. Imagine that! I don't understand why someone would want to take it so many times unless their command of the language is severely lacking. But to spend USD140 everytime is murder to the pocket. Anyways, I hope something good comes out of the test and of the universities when I send my results to them.

A Clean Room (Part 1)

Although I've always been one neat and tidy person, an everything in its place person, I was one never much bothered about dust. Dirt and tidiness are two entirely different things. Before you picture in your head, my room 2 inches under a layer of dust, think again. Sure, I clean my room once a week but only the floors. And the table tops and bookshelves when I see a layer of dust.

However, I only throughly clean my room - meaning spending hours throwing out stuff and wiping down furniture and books one by one when I have free time. Thus, it only happens during my holidays which occur every three months or so. Although I've been on vacation for almost a month already, I've never really cleaned my room throughly.

Today was different. I had a friend coming over and to tell you the truth, I've not changed the cushion covers of the couch in my room for a long long time. And I even can't remember the last time I sat on it; it was used for storage of my various posessions. So, after mopping the floors, I decided that it was time to do something about it. Its a funny thing because, once you start cleaning, it's hard to stop. After the couch, I progressed onto other surfaces in my room.

I was cleaning out my shelves and decided to discard a whole pile of brochures that I've been wanting to get rid of for a long time but never got to it. Guess what they were? American University brochures and application guides! I remember the day that I got them and it was the day that I actually decided to major in Environmental Science. The rest is history as they say. But, if it weren't for those brochures and the trip to the STAR Education Fair, I wouldn't be where I am right now. It's good to see yourself progressing onto different things in life.

Anyways, the time I spent cleaning my room might be the last few ones that I spend doing that. I wonder what'll happen to my room when I'm gone. Will it be used for storage? As a guest room?